The Un-Crumpling Part 5

The Un-Crumpling Part 5

These posts are intended to inform, educate and hopefully help others. I have found my own sources of help that have led me to wholeness. My prayer is that other victims may find healing and wholeness as well.

The decision to write about my experience, as a sexual abuse/incest survivor was not taken lightly; I consulted numerous people, looked at the ramifications from many angles, and prayed about it. Ultimately, it was the reaction of my older children that was the deciding factor. Their compassion, grace, anger for the situation and overall loving reaction served as a catalyst. Our children’s reactions cut the final thread of fear. Their acceptance was not only a testament to our parenting; it was also a message to be fearless. I finally was set free.

An interesting thing happens when people decide to share their stories, be vulnerable and choose fearlessness. Other people follow. I was well aware I might be opening a Pandora’s box of sorts. I knew from sharing with various people in a more private venue that sexual abuse and incest is rampant and nauseatingly common. I knew I would have other survivors come forward and approach me. In fact, this is one of the reasons I wanted to share my story. I wish for an open dialogue among those of us who have experienced this type of abuse.

I have yet to discover a support group in Phoenix for sexual abuse/incest survivors. My therapists have suggested there might be something of this sort on a list serve or with a meet up group. My guess is that lingering shame prevents victims from engaging. If anyone reading this knows of something I don’t, I would love to find out.

My hope is that open conversations can occur. My wish is for victims to tell their truth and to shine some light on their perpetrators. My prayer is for those who have been victimized may know they are not at fault, are not broken and are loved.

If you or someone you know has been a victim of sexual abuse or incest there is help and no matter how old you are or where you are in your life, I promise you it is worth the pain, terror and work to move toward healing. I know it might sound trite or like a weak public service announcement but I encourage you to seek help.

I have been there. I know those deep, dark crevices of shame. I know the anger. I know the panic.

It will be okay. You are okay. You can be un-crumpled